Outrun 2008 - Big Leggy's Blog

Fired with enthusiasm, like one of Alan Sugar's victims, Big Leggy has once again put his big finger to the keyboard to produce gripping tales of challenging tussles with the Leicestershire countryside and beer. But who will fall by the wayside and who will last the distance to become Big Leggy's six-figure side-kick? And will I be able to keep up with the pace of these reports? All questionmarks added by me on the assumption that BL has not managed to unstick his troublesome key. Someone said he was having trouble with his r's too but maybe I misunderstood.

OUTRUN 9 - June 25th - THE WHEEL BRANSTON (The No Watch Race)

A record field of 23 runners assembled at The Wheel in Branston for the 4th running of the race, with the three previous winners on the start line eager for another success. Little did we know that we were in for one of the biggest shocks for years, not the winner of the race but Sam in shorts, we hope to see him back in chinos next time.

The race was run over two courses along roads, woodland paths and farm tacks with the runners estimating their finishing time, the closest being declared the winner. First across the line on the short course (5 - 6 miles) was Imogen in an excellent 44mins 55secs although her local knowledge didn't help her as she was over 6 mins off her time. Second was Debbie in 48.30 @ 8.20 with Martin 3rd in 50.43 @ 10.43. Christian was the first across the line in the longer route (6-7 miles) finishing 4mins down in 47.05, 2nd was Phil in 51.12 @ 2.08 with Stewart 3rd in 51.21 @ 4.04.

The shock of the night wasn't Sams shorts, but was the perfomance of three junior Striders who put most of us in the shade when it comes to map reading and guessing their time. The winner overall was John (sorry don't know surname) in 52.45 only 15 seconds off his time, 2nd was Emma Brown in 54.10 @ 1.00 with 'Loz' Robinson 3rd in 52.33 @ 1.27. Congratulations to all of you. It was great to see some new faces, please come again.

We have now had 47 runners this season, will you be number 50. Aidy was there but only in a how much can I drink capacity so doesn't count!

As official time keepers, John and I were able to sample some of the excellent beers on offer at the pub which included Batemans XB and Bishops Farewell. John had an unusual method of testing the beer of the week, he drank the ones he liked and the ones he didn't he took into the road and kicked over. The Wheel also has an extensive menu with some unusual dishes available. It is also a dog friendly pub. I felt like Peter Purves at Crufts surrouded by Greyhounds, Terriers, Collies, an Hungarian Pooloo a German Shepherd and a Rhodesian Ridgeback who was on the run from his native country after spoiling his ballot paper by peeing on it.

As I wasn't pathfinder for this week I am unable to report on any trips, weird mud practices ancient monuments or mysterious beasts so it is only a short report.

FULL RESULTS
John 52-45 @ 15secs
Emma 54-10 @ 1.00
Loz 52.33 @ 1.27
Steve 51-44 @ 1.44
Phil 51-12 @ 2.08
Richard 49-18 @ 2.18
Sam 55-36@ 3.24
Stewart 51-21 @ 4.04
Christian 47-05 @ 4.05
Ian 55-36 @ 4.24
Gary 66-00 @ 5.00 Last to Cross the line
Pat 49-26 @ 5.34
Imogen 44-55 @ 6.05
Andy 53.52 @ 7.02
Mike 52-34 @ 7.26
Debbie 58.30 @ 8.20
Michelle 58-24 @ 8.24
Alison 64-14 @ 9.14
Vicki 55-50 @ 10.10 - so far off her time we thought she'd gone to Scarborough again.
Martin 50.43 @ 10.43 - and he went with her
Kirsty 55.50 @ 11.10 - and so did she
Julie 64-14 @ 25.16 and I thought Julie had gone to Austrailia without me.

This week's song which I have left 'til last, as I will probably hear the groan from here, is - Wheel Meet Again, don't know where, don't know when (for next year's No Watch Race) by the great Dame Vera Lynn.

See you in your best fancy dress gear at the Hose Pose on July 2nd

Best Regards Big Leggy

OUTRUN 8 - June 18th - THE TILTON TROT

As you all know, I try to find an appropriate song to go with the anything that happened during the run, but this week even after trawling through the book of hit singles I couldn't find anything. Just as I was about to give up and do the blog without a song it came to me. There I was having a shower thinking of Julie Andrews (does that happen to anyone else) and I thought it's got to be 'The Hills Are Alive With The Sound Of Music'.
Of course the hills around Tilton aren't exactly the Austrian Alps and we don't run around dressed in old curtains but it was pretty hilly. The music connection comes from the Jam Session (calm down Suzie not that type of Jam) back at the pub where three ageing funksters provided something loosely resembling music.

We did have a few complaints this week, even without Clive, about the amount of hills especially the final climb which seemed to go on forever and went through approximately 3 counties. The clue is in the title, the village is called Tilton on the Hill. I will try to organise some runs in the fens where the hills are much flatter. This week's trivia is that Tilton is the highest place eastwards until you reach the Ural mountains on the Russia Kazakhstan Plateau. This may be an old wives' tale but remember dockleaves from 2005!

This week's phone-in is the vote to choose your favourite Carry On film and I am expecting the usual response. The list has been narrowed down to three:
Carry on up the Khyber
Carry on up the Jungle
Carry on Screaming .
A vote already carried out in the pub revealed that the top three favourite characters were: 1st Gladstone Screwer, 2nd The Reverend Flasher, 3rd Private Widdle.
How the nights just fly by.

The highlight of the week came in the re-invention of the Stitch Stick. This is a stick scientifically designed to prevent or reduce the symptoms of the stitch. After about four miles Louise was suffering with stitch and so was provided with a stick to carry round to get rid of pain. It didn't work, I don't think her heart was in it. You have to be a believer.

Clinical trials to prove the effectiveness of the stick are still continuing, but results so far are encouraging. Further tests will be carried out over the coming weeks with runners asked to carry a variety of sticks of varying weights, lengths and species to study the ones with the greatest power of healing.

When the trials are completed and have the approval of the British Medical Association, I intend to provide a business plan and present it on The Dragons Den. After giving it some thought I believe £50,000 should be enough to develop a Stick Producing Plant for when the market takes off. The panel may think it is just a stick but it is more than that, it is a multi-tool, more of a Swiss Army Stick, with many uses (apart from the obvious medical benefits). They include a dog's toy for hours of fun, they can be used as a weapon in the event of a surprise attack or can used to start a fire (could do a BOGOF here). They could also be sold in a number of attractive colours in a handy carrying case. I will have to stop there as I don't want anyone stealing my ideas. This time next year we could be millionaires.

Winner of the GPS sweep was Mike at 8.2miles. Chris has 2 wins with Steve, Michelle and Mike on one each. £40 raised so far.

See you ALL at the No Watch Race at Branston.

Regards Big Leggy

OUTRUN 7 - June 11th - THE MARKO MUDDLE, MARKET OVERTON

Are you going to Scarborough Fayre
Parsley, sage, rosemary and thyme
etc etc
Simon and Garfunkel and The Beatles among others. Never charted as a single.

What has Scarborough got to do with anything you may ask. Well I am reliably informed that Vicky, who is now out of the running for the 100% award, boarded the wrong train at Leicester Station and ended up, and I think I heard this correctly, in Scarborough!!! I hope to receive a postcard shortly and a souvenir of her visit when she gets back. Steve McGarry also relinquished his 100% award when going, on purpose, to the coast for his holiday.

We were down to a disappointing 15 runners this week. Was the prospect of travelling 12 miles and crossing the county border on the same night too much for all you stay away members, or were you watching the footie. Perhaps in Sam's case he hasn't sewn his trousers up yet; please get that done before we see you again.

The run headed through Market Overton village heading through an industrial estate where we were surprised to be involved in the latest episode of Knight Rider - quite out of the blue we were approached from behind by a talking ambulance which very politely warned us he was there and then on passing by said ' thank you, have a nice day'. This got me to thinking about other talking cars but I could only come up with Kit (from Knight Rider), Noddy's car (but I think he only said 'Parp Parp'), Herbie (I don't think he ever spoke out loud but could understand you), and of course Rafferty's Motor Car by Val Doonican. Surprisingly this also never charted.

Following the footpath onto the Rutland Round (any one see the Rutland Times last week) we ran around a 6 metre margin full of Triticalia and Quinoa providing ground cover as requested by Defra in order to qualify for your single farm payment which the farmer may receive before he goes bust or dies whichever is the latter. The crop provides ground cover and food for the diminishing number of farmland birds. In fact they certainly will diminish if they don't get out from under your feet, dozens were almost squished on Wednesday night as they threw themselves in front of us as we ran by - Mike being the main culprit.

A nice track took us into Edmondthorpe before turning back on ourselves uphill and through a really muddy, churned up wooded part which the girls (particularly Kirsty and Emma) really enjoyed - so much so in fact that they wanted to do it again but unfortunately we hadn't got time. (Hope the exams went well Emma and all the revising has paid off, ignore your dad he doesn't mean it about the TV and computer games).

Zig zagging across the fields we eventually reached the road at the bottom of Marko Hill after an hour's running. Who was it who said if you give somebody a choice they will take the easy way out, not very catchy that and maybe who did say it wouldn't have admitted to it. I'm certainly not. Anyway, the point is it was 5 minutes back to the pub or to do the official full course was another 20 mins - big mistake giving an option. You may recall that early Christians being offered Death or Cake usually chose cake and football supporters offered Death or a Leicester City season ticket chose Death and, true to form, the Skivers amongst you chose the shorter course.

In doing this you missed out on the Beware of the Chickens sign (I bet you wished you had come now) and also a part of the run which reminded me very much of my time trekking through the bush in Africa and my encounters with the vertically challenged Hellarewe Tribe who in order to see where they were going had to jump up above the long grass shouting ' Where the Hellarewe' - much like Suzie was having to do. In fairness though the grass was very long, reaching up to my knees in some places. They don't call me Big Leggy for nothing.

Arriving back at the pub 20 minutes later (as I said) we were surprised to find that it had been twinned with a scary pub we went to last year (you know the one!). They did however have the football on and served a nice pint of Northern Rock although at £2.60 a go you needed a mortgage, I went for the 125% offer so I could afford the crisps. There was a varied menu available but nobody dared try it.

As the weather has begun to warm up many of the girls are opting for shorts - Kirsty looked very fetching in hers if a little shy. I am not sure about Celia's though. Were they plus fours or Stanley Matthews' old football shorts. Who knows. At this rate we may actually see Julie's legs. I haven't seen her in shorts since 1985, more on that story later.

Join us on Wednesday 18th June at the Crown at Tilton on the Hill (no need to cross the border) for another new run for 2008.

Don't forget the NO WATCH RACE at Branston on the 25th, let's make an effort to be there for the latest Club Race. New runners welcome, who will be number 50.

OUTRUN 6 - June 4th - THE BUFFALO RUN, BOUVERIE LODGE

After cementing Anglo-French relations and extending the Entente Cordial at Thorpe Satchville last week, it was back to the all together more English setting of Bouverie Lodge for the annual barbecue, and for once the weather was perfect. Of course the American Bison (sometimes called Buffalo) is, as its name suggests, originally from America where indiscriminate shooting (in America, surely not) almost brought it to extinction, which in turn resulted in the founding of the American version of the RSPCA. The buffalo does have a smaller European cousin found in the forests of Northern Europe, known as the Wisent.

Our thanks go to Ruth and George who once again provided an excellent repast (see old words) of salad, rice and potatoes to compliment the venison sausage and Buffalo burgers. One of the more astute members remarked that the burgers tasted of liver - anyone else spot it. So in true Richard and Judy fashion I thought we would have a phone vote:

Do Buffalo burgers taste of liver: To vote Yes call 0800 121 456 01, To vote No call 0800 121 456 02. Please remember to get permission before calling. Also be careful how you dial, I voted No and chatted for ages to a very nice young lady! While on the subject of phone votes, in last weeks blog I invited you to call me if you have a wish or a dream I can make come true. I have so far had less than one response. However a recent Mori poll has revealed that this is above average for the Striders. Next weeks phone vote will canvas the Striders opinion on our continued membership of the EU as I know politics are always a hot topic on a Wednesday. Tricky to find a song this week but I have come up with Bob Marleys Buffalo Soldier, which is apparantly a local tune about polishing a small bloke from the vet camp. This excellent madrigal (old word for reggae) reached number 4 in 1983.

During the run this week there were no landmarks or massive feats of Victorian engineering, so I have carried out more research into the John o Gaunt viaduct which was named after the the third son of Edward 3rd. The first train to cross the viaduct was the Loch Ness to Skegness via Dungeness Express and also more than 1000 bricks were used in its construction. Those Victorians eh I don't recall Adam Hart- Davies telling us that.

Two groups set off, 6 on the shorter route and 18 on the full route out towards Old Dalby and through the Horse fields to the top of the escarpment. Its funny the little bits of bizarre conversation you pick up as you run round. Kirsty for instance mentioned rubbing mud on her thighs to prevent nettle stings, can you imagine that. It sounds to me thats only a short to step to mud wrestling. I have heard that in some parts of Scandinavia there are Running and Mud Wrestling Duathalons and I wonder if it might be worth trialling this during next years out runs. Please let me know.

The highlight (for some people) and at the same time the disappointment (for others) was Sam splitting his trousers. Why does he run in his Chinos. Fortunately for everyone and I mean everyone he had not gone commando, it makes me poorly just to type this but as a trainee journalist it is my moral duty to keep the public informed.

The two groups re-joined for the last mile and ran down from the Dalby hills through the Buffalo back to the finish. This must be the best view in the area.

You may have noticed that last week's blog, whilst full of interesting stories, gossip and information was a bit jumbled up with no clearly defined paragraphs. So did I.

Beer of the week was Piddle in the Hole brewed at the Wyre piddle brewery in Dorset £1 a bottle from Morrisons (there are other supermarkets in Melton).

The winner of the GPS this week was Michelle who very kindly offered to donate her winnings to charity (£32 raised so far). We may later in the Summer allow the winner to keep their prize without booing or shaming them or even slagging them off on the blog into giving it back. Who will dare to do it.

A reminder of two events coming up - No Watch Race from The Wheel at Branston 25th June and also the Hose Pose Fancy Dress Night. Please try and get in the spirit for charity £1 to enter if you are in fancy dress £2 if you are not, the fee also includes a free go on the GPS sweep. So all those who never bring any money with them make sure you do on July 2nd.

There were one or two people at the barby who are not paid up members and did not pay the £6 for the night, you know who you are (and so do we) please pay this week. Also if there are any runners who have not paid their £20 membership please pay asap it is now long overdue.

We have now had 42 different runners on the outruns but more new faces are always welcome if you havn't been yet help us to reach the 50 mark. A special award to our 50th runner over the stile.

OUTRUN 5 - May 28th - 'LE CREPE NUIT CREEP - A LA REYNARD, THORPE SATCHVILLE'

Bonjour and welcome to Le Blog this week. Obviously I am unable to write the whole report in French (I can barely manage it in English) as there is so much to fit in this week after last week's meagre effort!

I did forget to say last week that the Handicap was the first race Suzie has won and she says she's now going for the No Watch Race double. Is there anyone out there who can stop her?

This week's song could have been anything sung by a Frenchman - She by Charles Aznavour, Raindrops keep Falling on my Head by Sacha Distel, but I thought that Thank Heavens for Little Girls by Maurice Chevalier was inappropriate in this day and age! Having discounted all of the above I have gone for (in light of the events of the evening) Life is a Minestrone by 10CC (No. 7 1975) "Life is a minestrone served up with parmesan cheese, life is a cold lasgane suspended in deep freeze, life is a fire of flaming brandy upon a crepe suzette. Let's get this moment cooking, honey, but let us not forget ....".

It might have been a crepe night weatherwise but it was far from crepe - with 23 runners braving the conditions, with just 6 100%ers remaining. Three new first timers this week - Emma 2, her friend Helen and a welcome return for our perennial old whinger, Clive, who was on form as usual. Although even he couldn't think what to complain about at one stile which had stingers, brambles, thistles and thorns. He was, for once, stuck for whinges!

We once agiain took over the pub car park and witnessed some excellent reversing, double parking and mere abandonment by the girls - anyone remember Reginald Molehusband. After the run we noticed that Emma 2's car had a puncture and the lads were queueueueueu (stop me!) ueing up to change the wheel. It almost came to fisticuffs - it was pathetic as well as chivalrous (see old words). I hope that if the Chairman suffers a puncture there would be similar queueueueue (I'm off again) of both men and ladies offering their services. I'm getting to the bit about the run but so much went on this week, I may not be able to mention Ian - falling off a stile into a hedge and the bit where Emma Brown wished she'd stayed at home revising for her GCSE's (or watching TV and playing computer games as Nick calls it!).

Special mention goes to Di's posse and this week 6 of them took the raod alternative which was 5.1 miles and this was a real breakthrough for Michelle who had never knowingly gone past 4 miles previously. They were flagged down by a mystery stranger in a car on the pretence of handing out entry forms for a race, with the poor opening chat up line "You ladies look fit, fancy doing this" before thrusting something in their hand and driving swiftly away!!

The main run took us across extremely muddy and overgrown fields but, worst of all, every stile we came to was surrounded by monster stingers. Being a hardened off-roader I am, of course, immune to the stings but I am always mindful of the health and safety of my flock and carry out an ongoing risk assessment, which may mean a change of route at a drop of a hat - be it through floods, tempest, cattle, plague of locusts etc. or, in this case, a footpath overgrown with nettles. We found out later that Sam thinks sheep are ferocious with their big teeth and sharp claws (!) and I will include them in future risk assessments. He may be getting them mixed up with wolves, which of course often dress up in sheep's clothing.

We eventually arrived in Burrough with the path taking us through somebody's garden to emerge into the second largest field in the Melton District. A short road section before heading over the fields to Twyford, passing beneath the John O'Gaunt viaduct. Built in 1874 by the LMS Railway, the Chief Engineer was Thomas Acton who was born in Nantwich in Cheshire and was educated at the University of Manchester where he studied Engineering. He married Gemma Bancroft and they had 7 children - some of their descendants still live in the area today. (A little bit of history there for you, as some of you were asking.) It's the little things that make the outruns worthwhile and the boyish smile on Matt's face as the viaduct came into view, was priceless. It had always been one of his dreams to run underneath the arches (Flanagan and Allen - 1930's) and I was happy to make his dream come true. If any of you have a sensible wish that I may be able to help with, call or email me.

The change of route in Twyford took us along the road to the finish at the pub. We were all wet and hungry and ready to sample the French Fayre. Savoury or sweet with plenty of choice, Steve went for the Ham & Mushroom (extra mushrooms - 50p) Gallette with Side Salad served on an attractive plate. In true culinary parlance he voted it "The best scran this year!" (I think I heard him correctly - who needs Darryl). Other chosen meals were the Ham & Onion Gallette and the Banana & Chocolate Crepe. I can tell the difference between a Fillet Steak and a Lamb Chop and between an Apple Pie and a Rhubarb Crumble but not between a Crepe Suzette and a Crepe with Butter, Sugar & Lemon. I chose the classic French dish of Crepe Suzette with Clementines, Orange Reduction (!!!) and Grande Marnier. When it was served I took it to be what I had ordered and tucked in even believing I could taste the oranges in brandy - which obviously I couldn't as there were none in it! It was delicious. It was only later I learnt that all the time Celia had been tucking into my Crepe Suzette and was unaware that I had her's and she had mine. She also had my trousers on - more on that story later. The only disappointment for me was missing the flambe bonfire. If anyone would like to flambe me a bison burger at the Barby next week I would be grateful.

How long is a piece of string - 6.1 miles to be precise. This is an appeal to anyone with a GPS. I am quite happy to measure the course using the OS Map and string technique but as competition for the Sweep hots up, just to get your name on the roll of honour some people, well Mike in particular, go down to 2 sometimes 3 decimal places and that's a bit tricky with string! While they all know the judges decision is final and it is all for charity (£22 for Air Ambulance so far) a more accurate measurement would be better. This week's winner was Chris who has a built in GPS - he has 2 wins to Steve's 1.

See you next week for the Barby where we hope for a nice evening.

Regards

Grand Leggy

PS You may have noticed I didn't mention the lovely French Landlady with the sexy French accent, it's because Julie told me not to!!

OUTRUN 4 - May 21st - Club Handicap, The Plough, Hickling

After a number of years in the wilderness the Handicap Race has made a return to the club calendar. This year the race began at Hickling and was on out and back course along the canal towpath towards Long Clawson and was over an inaccuratatly measured 5 mile course. Could have been slightly more could have been slightly less.

22 runners made the effort to compete for JAM and set off at intervals, with Celia the first away, followed some 19mins later by Christian. It was good to see him and also Stuart Owen and John Stares for the first time this Summer. There were some excellent times along the flat route.

First home was Suzie in an excellent time of 38.57, (starting 6.15 after Celia) second in 44.29 was Julie @ 1.45 and third was Louise in 40.03 @6.10. First Male was Tam Nichol in 34.15 @12.30.
Full results:
Suzie 45.07 actual 38.57 handicap 6.10
Julie 46.09 44.29 1.45
Louise 46.13 40.03 6.10
Michelle 46.35 32.35 14.00 3 miles
Tam 46.35 34.10 12.30
Alison 46.51 32,51 14.00 3 miles
Malky 47,31 35.01 12.30
Celia 47.32 47.32 0000
Mike 47.40 36.10 11.30
Vicki 49.09 36.39 12.30
Di 49.21 45.21 4.00
Phil 49.25 33.20 16.05
Alex 49.35 30.45 18.50 2nd fastest
Christian 50.01 30.29 19.30 Fastest
Ian 50.22 37.17 13.05 Nearest to Handicap
John 50.25 40.40 9.45
Wayne 50.40 34.20 15.00
Laura 51.27 35.32 15.55
Steve 51.32 35.07 16.25
Paul 51.55 33.10 18.45 3rd fatsest
Martin 52.56 40.26 12.30 Furthest from Handicap (sorry)
Stuart 53.15 35.05 18.10

Prizes included bottles of wine, lager, shortbread teddy bears, fizzy sweets and home made JAM. Winner Suzie swapped her bottle of wine with Christian for a jar of JAM (whats that all about). Anyway I've just been in the pantry and found some out of date Robertsons (gollies and all) and I'm off to see what Suzies got in the wine cellar.

Thanks to everyone who competed. The next Club Race is the NO WATCH RACE on 25th June at Branston.

OUTRUN 3 - May 14th - The Cross Swords, Skillington

This week's run began at The Cross Swords pub in Skillington where once again we had 22 runners who once again sorted themselves into short road 4ish, long road 8.75 ish and the real runners off-road (this is actually the idea of the out runs) but no matter we love you all and are happy to welcome runners of all abilities, styles and persuasion.

This week's song is by Tenpole Tudor and the Swords of a Thousand Men (number 6 in 1981) as we went, Too rai ooh rai oo rai ay over the hills with the swords etc. This is the song he is best remembered for but in fact his biggest hit was the unforgettable, Who Killed Bambi?

Have I mentioned car parks this year? This is now the third report so it is about time. This pub was possibly the worst yet for car parking. I swung into the car park only to find there was a bungalow there. I wonder if the pub know that a speculative builder has erected a bungalow where the car park once stood. Most of the road parking was taken up by an armoured personal carrier (or was it Grubers little tank) and I thought the army boys may have taken offence to last week's report and come along to sort it out.

We headed out towards Buckminster and then for Sproxton on the Viking Way where we were savaged by two dogs (this isn't true but for once it was a pretty uneventful evening) although we did hear later that Darryl was stung by a roadside nettle. Ouch!! Out towards Saltby we cut off towards the airfield carefully negotiating a hazardous sheer cliff face. Those of you who weren't there will not appreciate how tricky this was, and those of us who were there will big it up. A slight diversion took us through an enchanted wood, before heading back to Skillinton.

One of the nicest courses, nice easy terrain (apart from the cliff face) with everyone sticking together and a surprising distance of 8.4 miles covered with a bit of stop starting in 75mins.

The GPS Sweep is gathering momentum with £14 raised so far. The roll of honour with one win each is Chris Southam and Steve McGarry, will you be next? After 3 runs we have 9 in contention for the 100% award, although with 17 runs it may be tough to complete all so it may be a 93% or thereabouts award this year.

Beer of the week was Davenports IPA a really quaffable (see last week's old words section) ale. There was a varied menu with a wide selection of sandwiches available. I'm not sure if the culinary critique will continue, with the threat of legal action always hanging over it, but maybe it could become a recipe of the week. Darryl suggests a recipe, for instance a carrot cake or a linzer torte, we then cook that at home and bring him a slice to sample along with a disclaimer absolving him from any libel action.

OUTRUN 2 - May 7th - Stilton Cheese, Somerby.

Before the report begins you might be interested to know that I was trawling through some old archives and found a number of reports that have still not appeared on the website. These include: English Troops Thrash French at Agincourt, Napoleon Meets his Waterloo, The Relief of Mafeking, and Titanic Missing Presumed Sunk. More on those stories later.

As regular readers will know, I try to use an appropriate song title for each run but this week I am in a quandry. After the events of Wednesday two names sprang to mind, the first is a song by Barbera Steisand and Neil Diamond but unfortunately I can't remember the title (anybody help) and the second one is They Shoot Horses a number 14 hit for Racing Cars in 1977. After much thought I plumped for Racing Cars.

I quite enjoyed plumping and I thought it would an idea to bring back into every day use some of those old words that are now dying out, such as plump, quandry, veritable, incubus, fastidious and of course curmudgeonly.

There is always something to report on an out run compared to a run around around Melton when there is always nothing to report, the problem is where to start.

Three groups set off from the pub - Darryl and Kirsty for a long one on the road, Di's posse for a shorter road route with the main group heading down the Leicester Round over the fields to the Dalby hills path car park with regular stops allowing us to re-group. A quick head count and we realised that the boys from the Vet camp had not made it this week. Are we to be concerned if they are not fit enough to run 7 or 8 miles or had they got an event on?

Out on the road we headed towards Pickwell. The early part of the run went smoothly with no sign of the mayhem yet to come, although in a show of respect to Liz who wasn't with us, we did have a couple of fallers. As you may know Liz had a fall last week hurting her arm. Matt said he had to do everything for her as it was the arm that moves the gear stick!!

Up the big climb into Cold Overton before a downhill to nettle wood, the views at this point were spectacular. A straight run for home now over easy to follow well marked paths which without the pathfinder at the head of the field directing operations proved too much for these amateurs who made up their own way back. Having got split up towards the rear, guiding Vic, Louise and Suzie home, I waited for them at the bottom of a small climb. After 2 or 3 minutes they were nowhere to be seen - I retraced my steps but they had disappeared. We found out later that they had missed the path and headed for the road, stopping at a farm house for directions to Somerby. The old boy must have thought he had died and gone to heaven when he opened his door to find three ladies dressed in running kit. The only people who knock at my door are a 75 year old Jehovah's witness and reps from N Power advising me that I can save £2 over ten years if I sign today.

Rejoining the route I thought I was in for a lonely run back, but only 4 fields later I was stopped in my tracks by a furious, snorting beast with horrible bulging eyes in a stand off at a stile. This was only Wayne. The rabid horse was none to happy either (I don't think horses get rabies but it is a good word). Wayne and Ian had been waiting for a few minutes but the horse was in a terrible rage kicking and foaming at the mouth; unconfirmed reports suggest he had been poked with a stick by an earlier runner. The owner then came out and the horse turned his attention on him while we slipped round an alternative route. Shooting him (the horse, not the owner) would have been a bit drastic but may have been a good idea at the time. Is there a horse whisperer in the club.

With everyone back safely at the pub we had our first GPS sweep. Even if you don't stay for a drink have a go on the weekly sweep. It's only 50p - half for the winner, half for charity. This week we raised £6, not a lot but over the Summer we may make £100.

Our cookery correspondent tucked into sandwiches this week and his report will follow this item. Beer of the week was Toad in Pocket, which refers to the quaint old custom of putting a toad in your pocket to keep you healthy and ward off evil spirits.

22 runners were at this week's run and we would like to see a few more on the 14th at Skillington for the Swashbuckle, where there will be a long route or a shorter alternative.

A reminder that the club handicap has been added to the calendar again this year on the 21st May from Hickling and will take place on the Canal tow path. Please try and attend to make it a success. Prize giving in the pub afterwards.

And lastly best wishes for a speedy recovery to all our lame ducks (sorry injured runners) out there including Tim, Chris, Liz etc etc if I have forgotton anyone please add your name to the list.

Regards

Big Leggy

OUTRUN 1 - April 30th - Carington Arms, Ashby Folville

The Power You're Supplying
It's Electrifying
(John Travolta and Olivia Newton John 1978)

The Summer out runs began on Wednesday form the Carrington Arms and despite the poor weather 27 runners turned up to run a variety of routes.

I was more than a little concerned that after 3 or 4 years of writing reports for the Summer runs I would not find anything to say (actually I can always find something to say).

A small group of 2 runners, Darryl and Kirsty, set off for a long road run, Di and Alison did a shorter road run and a group of 4 set off on the official four and half mile run - more on that story later. The rest set out on the Midshires Way towards Thimble Hall over extremely wet, muddy and slippy fields. Thoughts of the return of the GPS sweep were quickly forgotten as Gary, unusually for him was late!! and he joined the rear of the group. No mishaps so far but as we turned past the hall downhill Liz tripped and fell (not sure if this is news any more), after a whole year without a fall Liz was back to her balletic best with a trip and slide of real quality. The front runners missed the footpath at the bottom of the hill and crossed the fence without realising the fence was electric. Paul was the first to feel the pain with the shock making his hair fall out Phil also got caught and one of his five shirts blew off.

Regrouping near Baggrave Hall a short road section before we headed across the fields towards South Croxton. It was at this point Alex asked if I could find a muddier run. Well yes actually I can and if this was a request I can find one but I suspect it was an attempt at sarcasm.

At South Croxton (or Barsby as Gary the logistics and delivery manager called it) we split and headed back to the pub.

On arrival everybody had returned with the exception of the Ashby Four: Julie, Celia and Fraser and Woody from the Vet camp had not arrived. Where had they got to? It was only a 4 or 5 mile route and they should have been back. There was an extra mile add on if they felt fit but Julie was adamant "well I won't be doing that" she said. Had one of them got injured? A search party was organisied with Di and myself heading out to find them. However we needn't have worried - they beat us back to the pub. After interrogation and a de-brief it appears that apprentice pathfinder (should she be allowed out) missed the turn and they ended up completing around 8 miles having never ran more than 5 before. Obviously running with the fighting Farriers from the Vet camp they were safe. I have never lost one yet.

With the Farriers and other skilled workers and tradesmen in the club I was thinking of setting up a Thompson style trade directory. Farriers could re-shoe your rocking horse or put segs in your loafers. Tim could exorcise your radioactive compost heap. Suzie could give German lessons in the style of Helga from Hello Hello. It would only take one Chris Southam to change a light bulb. Martin could organise a flume for your fishpond and we could ask Darryl if he knows anyone who could advise us on cooking and running a cafe.

A new addition to this years blog is Darryl's Culinary Critique Column. I am not sure what qualifies him for this but he will be sampling the fayre at each of the pubs on the out runs and giving his expert opinion on the food, surroundings and atmosphere. I will retain the contract on the beer of the week award, which this week was the 4.8% Adnams Bitter - sharp and yet smooth, remind you of anyone?

See you all and more at Somerby next week where we hope for a dry evening - (fear not - I am sure Neil is referring to the weather rather than the post-run refreshment)

Regards Big Leggy.

DARRYL (BIG EGGY)'S FOOD REVIEW (sorry couldn't resist) - A pub in a village near Melton (just so I dont get sued). (mmm... perhaps I should think of a different structure for these outrun reports and food reviews.)

Some call me Bumpy Rhodes some call me Anthony Bumhole Thompson, some call me Gay Gordon but let me introduce myself: I am Heston Bluebottle, your fly on the wall food critic. After a great run, 8 miles on the road for the intelligent, and a 7 mile swim across the fields for the retarded, it was time to eat. More Michelin tyre than Michelin star. However for Pub Grub it was pretty damn good. The food was served quickly by a friendly waitress. My keen eye told me that she might have just been eating a few leftovers.

Kirsty, who seems to be still replenishing calories after the Marathon, had Stuffed Peppers with Cous Cous. Truth be known, I dont think she knew what she was ordering (I did tell her Cous Cous was french for Fillet Steak). Anyway, it disappeared well quick so it must have been good.

Wayne, who couldnt make up his mind if he was on a diet or not opted for Salad & Chips. I think he really wanted a MacDonalds as this seems to be his training meal of choice at the moment.

I had Chicken with cashew nuts and red onions. It was tasty and a large portion, smelt good, and it was at about this time that the vultures started to hover. A side portion of Veg appeared and nobody could decide whose it was supposed to be, so, Neil, pretending to be interested in the conversation sidled over and tucked in, seemingly mesmorised by the steamed red cabbage (he must have led a sheltered life). Ian used a different tactic and quietly finished off the leftovers in the corner. Actually, thinking about it, he probably ate the most. All in all, a good meal in good company with some good banter.